I’ve had my facebook account for almost six years. I got it my freshman year of college and it wasn’t something that I even created for myself. My friend did it for me as a surprise because he had been badgering me for months to start one and he knew I would never do it myself. My excuses were simple “what’s the point? Is it hard to set up? Will it take me forever, and why would I want a facebook anyways?” The idea seemed completely foreign to me. I just wondered what the big deal was with facebook anyway. Mostly I was afraid that I wasn’t going to be able to find out how to maneuver the site. Things like that frustrate and annoy me. When it isn’t simple then I don’t like it. Back then I barely got by doing my online banking. Since that time I have drastically advanced in that area. I can’t be sure but I think it’s because my actual face time with my computer increased. I mean the amount of time I spend in front of my computer went from like 45 min six years ago to about 2-3 hours a day. There are many reasons to explain this. One, as I became independent and had to pay for my own bills and manage my own accounts doing everything paperless and online saved me time and money. Second, since I started college my laptop and internet access are crucial for every aspect of being a student (ex: this class). Lastly, people just don’t communicate like they used to. It’s all done through cell phones and computers.
From what I’ve been able to observe from facebook about how people tend to want to be perceived and the things they want to reveal is that pretty much they want to make it seem like life is good and everything ‘s ok. I hardly ever see someone write “I hate my marriage and want a divorce.” This is a reality that exists for many people but it is something that our society does not want to hear about. Thus it is something that you would never post on your facebook. Why? Because in general, people want to be perceived as being happy, gay, blissful, and enjoying life. People don’t want other people to know the bad things. I wouldn’t want everyone to know that my life is a wreck and I am a big failure. That stuff stays private and hidden and the good stuff gets exposed. There is good and bad in my life but I want to be perceived as a person who is making it in life. I want people to know that school is going good, that I have a great social life, that I have a good relationship with my family, that I bought a car, that I’m going swimming today etc.. When in reality I’m about to have a panic attack because I don’t have enough money for rent, that I don’t spend time with my family because I work to much in order to have enough money to pay rent, and that I lost my pool key so on these hot summer days I can’t even go to the pool. Life is hard and we all go through tough times. I don’t want to reveal my struggles to the world because I want to seem strong and confident, powerful and in control. In Our textbook wood and smith talk about messages fashioned through media are reflections of self. Well if this is the case then my explanation above makes perfect sense. People don’t just leave out the bad stuff because they want to; they do it for a reason. If I am telling myself that I’m going to be fine, I’m going to make it, things are going to be ok, then those are the messages that I am going to radiate out through the media. In order for those thoughts to be true I have to think them to be true. I don’t know if any of you have read the book The Secret but it has essentially that same principle; send out messages into the universe and they will come back as being true. I reveal things that I want to be my reality and I think that for the most part that is ok. As long as I am not hurting others and if I feel it helps me and my identity in a positive way. I want the reflection of myself to be positive and that’s why I radiate positive and happy things on my facebook. If I say so, then it will be so.
I think if our society was different and talking about all things was accepted then I think I would be more revealing on facebook and show more than one side of my life, not just the good stuff but also the struggles. I think a lot of people would, not just me.
I am glad you were so blunt had pointed out that you rarely see people posting about the bad things going on in their lives. It's usually about all the things they are doing and how great their life is. And that is one of the main reasons I hate facebook, it gives people an opportunity (a bad one in my opinion) to be the person they wish they could be. Act like everything is ok and everyone will think I have everything going great in my life, when in reality I don't. Why do people have to be so fake and act like no one goes through hard times when everyone does. I bet if people were more apt to being blunt about such things society would be better and there wouldn't be so many people on anti-depressants because they are trying to lead this perfect life when in reality it is far from it.
ReplyDeletePeople really do only post the good things they want people to hear. And if they do by chance write about all the bad stuff happening in their lives then usually people start to think of them as attention getters and only writing that stuff for sympathy. And even when someone who usually doesn't post the bad things, does post they are having a bad, responses are usually, 'don't worry things will get better' or 'just stay positive'. when most likely all that person wanted was to vent a little, they really don't need those automatic response. They just wanted to get it out.
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